elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey:
WHY IS THIS WHAT MY BEDROOM LOOKS LIKE
“teachers don’t give too much homework”
all i want is context
the context is above you
i really hope they helped clean this up and didn’t leave the poor janitorial staff to do it all
I saw the original post on Reddit. That’s all 4 years worth of homework (they save it up for this tradition) and the underclass men clean it up (3 years of cleaning it up earns you the right to do it your senior year). The janitorial staff are there to hand out trash bags, but that’s it.
Tag: sort of
Posessive
Based off of @clotpolesonly‘s tags on this post. I immediately thought sterek, of course, so tadaaaa~ Read on AO3
When Derek wakes up, before he even opens his eyes, the first thing he hears is a voice in his head saying, “Uh, hey. Good morning.”
In his sleep-addled state, Derek’s eyebrows just furrow in confusion. His eyelids are heavy, and he can’t quite blink them open, like his upper and lower eyelashes are glued together.
“Yeah, uh, I’d keep ‘em shut if I were you. I don’t have full control, obviously, but, you probably wouldn’t like what you’d see.”
Derek’s mouth opens fine, and he licks his chapped lips. He feels his heartbeat pick up, like his body is going into a panic-mode, but his thoughts haven’t caught up yet. “Why not?” he croaks out. His throat feels parched as well.
“Let’s just say that it wouldn’t be you looking out.”
Derek’s brain begins to catch up. “Are you talking in my head?”
“Sort of.”
“Then what are you doing?”
“I possessed you.”
Derek’s thoughts snap into place and he feels himself jolt up. His claws dig into the dirt around him, and blades of grass brush his fingers. Had he fallen asleep outside again? His memories are a bit jumbled. But now that he’s awake, he can tell that whatever is talking to him is in no way human.
Derek bares his fangs, eyes still closed. He growls out his words. “Get the fuck out of me.”
If Derek didn’t know any better, he would have said the demon or whatever parasite is in him had whimpered. “Shit, man.” The thing sounded offended, what the fuck? “I just needed a host to stay in for a while. Mine is a little, uh, damaged. And I can’t go back yet.”
*incoherent screaming* You opened prompts! Sterek: Not yet together sterek. The idea is a bath and Stiles how did you get that there?!? Thank you.
Taking Sterek Prompts | Filling Prompts Live
———
“Are you going to get in?” Stiles asked, peeling out of his last shirt, his words a little slurry around the edges. “In a- a- a-” He paused, trying rather unsuccessfully to shake his hand free of his sleeve. He started laughing uncontrollably and collapsed to the floor to work on his shoes. “The water, are you?”
“No,” Derek groused, pointedly not looking when Stiles flopped onto his back and began to shimmy out of his soaked pants. Black slime coated almost every square inch of the floor. “This is your bath, not mine.”
“Mine,” Stiles echoed, now just lying on the floor in a puddle of black, his pale skin coated head to foot in the gunk. “This is not my house.”
“Yes,” Derek agreed, as patiently as he could, checking the water’s temperature before turning off the tap. It had to be extra hot to affect the stuff. “This is the clinic.”
Deaton had explained that even minimal contact with the ichorous substance gave a contact high. Stiles had been practically drenched in the stuff when they had killed it. Luckily it was not deadly or even toxic- which was the problem. Someone had been keeping the creature as a pet, drawing out the fluid and selling it, and it had escaped three days ago to wreak havoc.
Very, very unfortunately, Derek had drawn the short straw for ensuring Stiles got cleaned up and came down from the high safely. Isaac, Boyd, and Erica were taking care of disposal of the body while Scott and Allison swung by Allison’s house to return weapons and report to her father. Deaton had been kind enough – or perhaps had enough self preservation – to give Derek the key to the clinic so he could get Stiles washed up away from his father’s questions.
“Come on,” Derek said gently, slipping from the edge of the tub to crouch at Stiles’ side. It was, he reflected, a very good thing that werewolves were not susceptible to the substance’s effects. “You gotta get cleaned up.” The effects wouldn’t wear off until every drop of the ichor was gone.
Stiles lifted his head, looking all the way down his lean form. “Oh, no, no that’s too far,” he told Derek, head falling back with an audible clunk he was probably going to feel in a few hours. “Wow, this is the best floor ever. Do you think I could take it home with me?”
“No,” Derek said with a sigh. Looked like this was going to have to be the hard way. He shifted, kneeling beside Stiles, and grabbed at his wrists to haul him up.
Despite that they slipped and slid a bit, Derek managed to get a very naked Stiles upright and across the three feet to the tub. For a second Stiles stood very still, holding tightly onto the edge of it like he was going to resist going in. Then he tipped forward and faceplanted directly into the basin so quickly Derek had to scramble to keep him from drowning.
“Hoooooo!!!!” Stiles shouted the second his mouth was above the surface, water sluicing away the ichor clinging to his skin. “It’s hot, Derek! This is really hot, why is it so hot? Oh my god, I’m melting!” He started grabbing at the black liquid coming off his skin.
Closing his eyes, Derek counted to three. Then five. Then ten, for good measure, and when he opened them again, Stiles had fallen very, very still and was staring wide eyed into the middle distance. It was not exactly an improvement, but at least he’d stopped thrashing, slopping water and ichor all over the floor and flinging it onto the walls and- and was that- on the ceiling?
“Stiles, how did you- you know what, nevermind,” Derek grumbled, reaching for the spray nozzle.
This setup was supposed to be for cleaning dogs, but it would work just as well for ornery, tripping humans. He began to run the spray over Stiles’ hair, watching the black give way to brown. When the tub had filled completely, Derek pulled the plug and let it drain. Diluted like this with water, it wouldn’t hurt the general populace; at worst, they’d all have a really good day soon.
Stiles’ eyes slid closed, and he relaxed into the gentle touches Derek used to turn him this way and that, to get at the last of the ichor still clinging to strange places like inside of his ears and between his fingers and- well, at least Stiles was unlikely to remember any of this very well tomorrow.
By the time he had gotten the last of it, Stiles had turned to putty in his hands, making a soft, pleasant humming noise that might have been purring on a cat. Derek swallowed hard, trying to keep it together. He still needed to get Stiles someplace to wait out the high, and get this place cleaned up so no one else would be affected.
Difficult to think of anything beyond the way Stiles pressed himself into Derek’s touches. “Feels good,” Stiles murmured, unwilling or unable to keep his eyes open. “You should touch me more.”
“Tomorrow,” Derek mumbled back, prodding Stiles to his feet. The floor was still covered in ichor, so Derek just leaned over and scooped a completely unresisting Stiles into his arms. Immediately, Stiles looped his own arms around Derek’s neck and burrowed his nose against Derek’s shoulder. “If you still want me to touch you tomorrow, I will.”
“Okay,” Stiles agreed muzzily.
He wouldn’t remember. No one else had. Still…
He allowed himself a small smile, and a measure of hope. Stiles had never been one for following the rules, after all.
“Was it one of the weird types?”
“Weird types?”
“You know, like one that makes you really horny?”
“…. What would you be willing to do if it was?”
Unrealized
Title: Unrealized
Pairing: Sterek, with a handful of others (both male and female) kissing Stiles
WC: 2977
Summary: You know how they always say, “Be careful of what you wish for?” Yeah, in Beacon Hills you need to be a lot more careful than most.Or, that time when half of Stiles’ friends start kissing him, and really, what the actual fuck?
For @eeyore9990, who requested Steter, Sterek, Stydia, or Stallison first kiss. Or just anyone kissing Stiles. Well darling, I hope I delivered. 🙂
He knows something’s up when Danny kisses him, because he’s self-aware, okay?
“Hey, Danny Boy, I have a very legitimate, totally-not-illegal use for those magical fingers of your-mpff.” He’s entirely unprepared for the devastating smile Danny levels at him before sliding into his space, dropping a hand to one hip and his lips to Stiles’, which are gaping like a fish. It doesn’t take Stiles long to decide that he much prefers to go with the flow rather than try to figure out what the fuck, because seriously, what the fuck?
When Danny pulls back the smile is still there, albeit with more of a self-satisfied bent to it. “I probably have a better use for my fingers than the one you have in mind,” he murmurs with a wink, and Stiles figures now is probably a good time to try to figure out what the fuck.
“You know what, I remembered I need to meet my dad at the station,” Stiles says, a touch of apology in his tone to lend credence to the lie. He finger-guns Danny and winks back, though he knows his own is probably more maniacal than suave. “Hold that thought, okay?”
He fast-walks away from Danny, backward so he can keep his suspicious eyes on him, and as soon as Danny’s out of sight, he’s fumbling for his phone and dialing. “Scotty, what the fuck?”
A Thin Line Between Love and Hate
In response to this prompt I saw from @werewolfzero: Sterek fic, future or AU possibly all humans, where Scott is getting married and his best friends Stiles and Derek are the two groomsmen and they both love Scott but HATE each other, everybody knows this, until suddenly they don’t know anything because Erica Reyes just walked in on the two in a closet goin’ at it with suits around their ankles and even though Scott is getting married in 30 minutes the only thing all his friends and family can talk about is how his best friends are hiding a torrid love affair and isn’t that just so interesting?
Erica closed the door to the bridal suite and sighed at the sight in front of her. “Oh my god, you two are pathetic.”
Scott and Allison both just grinned up at her from where they were sitting on the carpet, on opposite sides of the propped-open bedroom door. They were even holding hands around the door, Jesus Christ.
“We’re not breaking the rules!” Scott protested. “I can’t see her.”
She rolled her eyes and stepped over to the full-length mirror to check her hair. “The cake is fine, by the way, it looks great. It’s all set up.”
Allison breathed a sigh of relief. “Oh, thank goodness. Thanks so much for checking on that.”
“Could you try to find Stiles and Derek?” Scott asked, puppy eyes out in full force. “They’re not answering their phones and no one has seen them in a while, so there’s a decent chance they’ve killed each other.”
Erica scoffed. “You know it was probably a terrible idea to pick two best men in the first place, let alone two best men who hate each other.”
“Yeah,” he said, sighing. “I know. But it’s my brother and my best friend! I couldn’t pick one over the other.”
“Even though they almost got into a fistfight at the engagement party?” she said dryly, and Allison stifled a laugh.
“They’ve pushed each other’s buttons since we were kids, it’s weird. I was hoping that they could put stuff aside for the wedding, but clearly that was too much to hope for.”
“Did you decide which one would get to stand next to you?”
“No,” he said sulkily. “It started a fight every time I brought it up. They said they’d figure it out between themselves.”
Erica rolled her eyes again and headed for the door. “Fine. But if I have to break up a fight and get blood on this dress, I’m gonna be pissed.”
“Thanks, Erica!” Allison called out, and she tossed a halfhearted wave over her shoulder.
Erica took the elevator down to the hotel lobby and sighed, her hands on her hips. She had no idea where to start looking for two feuding best men. Lydia probably would, though, and since she was surely whipping everyone into shape in the ballroom, Erica headed in that direction. There was a long hallway connecting the event center to the hotel, and Erica paused when she heard a suspicious thump coming from…was that a door?
Unable to resist her curiosity, she very gently tried the handle. Unlocked. Grinning, she pulled it open with a flourish. Erica was greeted by a manly yelp, and she blinked, trying to adjust to the darkness and pick out the two figures who were frozen in front of her.
Holy shit. It was Stiles and Derek, and from their messy hair, loosened ties, and undone pants, it wasn’t exactly a tough mental leap to figure out what they’d been doing. She laughed and stepped in closer, trying to get a better look, but Derek scowled fiercely and shoved Stiles behind him.
“This isn’t what it looks like!” Stiles called out, from behind Derek’s shoulder, and Derek rolled his eyes.
From
How I Became a Famous Novelist by Steve Hely
JFC.
ETCH THIS INTO MY HEADSTONE.
Sarky air hostess Stiles and confident business man Derek in first class?
stilinskihaleworld-deactivated2:
Hi! I don’t know if you saw my post from just now, but I’m so sorry this took me so long! I think I asked for prompts a long, LONG time ago to help work through some writer’s block but couldn’t do it and so I’m just getting to all those prompts today! Anyway, this one actually turned out kinda dirty? Which surprised me becauseeeee it’s me and we all know I don’t really write smut. I’m sure you’ve forgotten that you ever submitted this, but I hope you enjoy 😀
Derek lowered his
muscular frame tiredly into his soft, first class seat. His connecting flight
back to New York from Australia had been delayed by weather and he was now jet
lagged and already late for his next meeting which hadn’t even started yet. A
loud yawn escaped his mouth that Derek didn’t bother stifling and it was
followed closely by another.“He thinks he’s
tired.” Derek heard the flight attendant mutter to himself. His back was
turned, so Derek couldn’t see his face, but his hip was aggressively cocked and
Derek couldn’t help but stare at his ass a little so he decided to engage.“I do in fact happen
to be very tired.” He announced purposefully, hoping his tone would force the
attendant to address him directly. When he turned to face Derek, the
businessman couldn’t resist giving him an obvious once-over and the flight
attendant’s beautiful, pale cheeks turned an indignant shade of red as his
brown eyes flashed angrily.“We don’t have to
accommodate passengers who don’t know how to respect the attendants. You can be
removed from the flight quite easily.”Derek gaped at him a
moment in surprise. He wasn’t used to his attention being received so
negatively and he definitely didn’t want to be perceived as some sort of
womanizer. Or…manizer?“No, that won’t be
necessary.” He answered stridently.The attendant gave a
definitive nod and turned swiftly away from Derek but not before he caught the
definitive “Good boy,” that left his lips at barely more than a commanding
whisper.